This weekend I went to Reclaim the Night, the British version of Take back the night. Yes, they stole the idea from Americans, yes they had it in November, yes it was freezing! It was very cool though. We walked in the middle of the streets from Embankment to Kings Cross, which took about 2 hours. We chanted "Whatever we wear, where ever we go, yes means yes and no means no!" and "Say hey (hey) ho (ho) Sexual violence has to go!" and my favorite "Women united, will never be defeated!" We also sang clever rhymes. I carried a picket sign that said "Stop violence against women." But I think the best part was the people on the pavement taking pictures and people popping their heads out of their windows either showing support or just seeing what all the noise was about. I felt like I was taking part of something important, important enough for passers-by to take notice.
I do have some complaints about the evening. Maybe it's just cultural differences or maybe it's actual wrongs, I'm not sure. First off the march was womens only by rule. Now I suppose I can sort of justify this. It is a march to support women who have been effected by male violence and to show that we won't stand for it. But the fact of the matter is we can't end male violence against women without the support of men! I think we need men to feel a part of our efforts and excluding them isn't helping anything. That's why I hate the word Pro-feminist. Why can't everyone be a feminist?
I also didn't care for the rally after the march. We all came in from the bitter cold and sat down on the floor to listen to 6 speakers. A few of them talked about the joy of sisterhood we all experienced but mostly they talked about hate. How much they hated the world for allowing violence against women. Now I hate rape as much as the next feminist. It's what got me into feminism in the first place. But these women were all about hate. And maybe it's just a cultural difference but my experience with Take Back the Night as always been one of positive healing energy and support. At JMU we hear survivors stories and then go on a candlelit vigil for other survivors. Yes we hate the abusers, but that's not the focus.
When I created this blog I thought about calling myself an angry feminist. Because I'll tell you what, I am angry. I'm angry that women get paid less than men, I'm angry we've been sold into marriage, I'm angry rape exists, I'm angry about how we're portrayed in the media. But here's the thing. Hate and angry don't do anything but cause more violence and hate. It's a vicious cycle and I would give anything to end it. There's a reason MLK Jr and Ghandi were so effective. I think we all need to take a step back and find a way to combat hate without hate. Isn't that what Harry Potter taught us? lol
Monday, November 29, 2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
Eve
So I just learned that one of Eve's punishments for eating the apple was to desire her husband and be obedient to him.
"Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you” (Genesis 3-4).
Ok seriously? As women, our punishment is to love men who control us? Seriously God?! What is it with you and disobedient women? First Lilith, now Eve. I think I've mentioned Lilith before but if not I'll give the cliffsnotes here. She was supposedly Adam's first wife. They were created from the same earth and therefore were equal. When she refused to be subservient to him, she left the garden forever. She, like Lucifer, became a demon in hell.
Of course another punishment is that childbirth would really hurt. But this means that loving men is supposed to be as painful as labor? What?! How is that right at all? How are we supposed to believe in a perfect, all loving God who would do this?
I remember once when I used to go to church, I heard this story of a journalist who wanted to dissect the Bible to prove it's fraud. But when he dove into it, he found he couldn't. He became a Christian. Did he just skip over this part? Or is it proof that Christianity supports patriarchy and he, as a man, just benefitted more from the word of God?
On a somewhat related note, I was just thinking about how the apple open Eve and Adams eyes and showed them they were naked. Isn't this proof God wants us to be naked all the time? Also it's proof that we as a people have over sexualized the human body. If you believe in the Christian God (which for the record I do not), then you should accept that nakedness is natural and the less clothes you wear, the closer to God you are. But of course Christians are the ones who call me a slut for not wearing a bra.
"Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you” (Genesis 3-4).
Ok seriously? As women, our punishment is to love men who control us? Seriously God?! What is it with you and disobedient women? First Lilith, now Eve. I think I've mentioned Lilith before but if not I'll give the cliffsnotes here. She was supposedly Adam's first wife. They were created from the same earth and therefore were equal. When she refused to be subservient to him, she left the garden forever. She, like Lucifer, became a demon in hell.
Of course another punishment is that childbirth would really hurt. But this means that loving men is supposed to be as painful as labor? What?! How is that right at all? How are we supposed to believe in a perfect, all loving God who would do this?
I remember once when I used to go to church, I heard this story of a journalist who wanted to dissect the Bible to prove it's fraud. But when he dove into it, he found he couldn't. He became a Christian. Did he just skip over this part? Or is it proof that Christianity supports patriarchy and he, as a man, just benefitted more from the word of God?
On a somewhat related note, I was just thinking about how the apple open Eve and Adams eyes and showed them they were naked. Isn't this proof God wants us to be naked all the time? Also it's proof that we as a people have over sexualized the human body. If you believe in the Christian God (which for the record I do not), then you should accept that nakedness is natural and the less clothes you wear, the closer to God you are. But of course Christians are the ones who call me a slut for not wearing a bra.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
BBC Four
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hbw8q3mrmXs
I just love the Dad saying she's had a charmed life so what's she bitching about?
I really try to be rational about feminism. I don't like to get angry because of course that just shuts people down and no one wins. But there is something that can send me into a fit and that's rape and sexual assault. Now I've never been raped. And when I first got into rape crisis, I didn't really know anyone who'd been raped. So what I'm saying is it wasn't personal. It wasn't something I did out of love for a specific person or to help myself heal (not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm so very proud of all the survivors who are willing to brave triggers to help women, you are my heros). My activism was something I did out of the horror of realizing this really happens. It happens to at least 25% of women in the world. And it can only happen in a world that hates women. And we do live in that world. Just watch the latest episode of Private Practice and you'll see. I'm sad to say I completely understand the rapists reasoning. I mean he's not just a random psycho. I can absolutely see this happening in real life. And isn't that the scariest thing you've ever thought.
Rape makes me angry. I can't believe we as a culture have allowed it to exist for so long. But that's what patriarchy is. Its a system that allows rape by protecting men through any means necessary. Whether it's calling women liars, slut shaming, or only sending 5% of convicted rapists to jail. And that's why I'm a feminist. I recognize that individual men are not to blame, patriarchy is. And I have hope that I will see a world without patriarchy and without rape.
I just love the Dad saying she's had a charmed life so what's she bitching about?
I really try to be rational about feminism. I don't like to get angry because of course that just shuts people down and no one wins. But there is something that can send me into a fit and that's rape and sexual assault. Now I've never been raped. And when I first got into rape crisis, I didn't really know anyone who'd been raped. So what I'm saying is it wasn't personal. It wasn't something I did out of love for a specific person or to help myself heal (not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm so very proud of all the survivors who are willing to brave triggers to help women, you are my heros). My activism was something I did out of the horror of realizing this really happens. It happens to at least 25% of women in the world. And it can only happen in a world that hates women. And we do live in that world. Just watch the latest episode of Private Practice and you'll see. I'm sad to say I completely understand the rapists reasoning. I mean he's not just a random psycho. I can absolutely see this happening in real life. And isn't that the scariest thing you've ever thought.
Rape makes me angry. I can't believe we as a culture have allowed it to exist for so long. But that's what patriarchy is. Its a system that allows rape by protecting men through any means necessary. Whether it's calling women liars, slut shaming, or only sending 5% of convicted rapists to jail. And that's why I'm a feminist. I recognize that individual men are not to blame, patriarchy is. And I have hope that I will see a world without patriarchy and without rape.
feminist stands for pure evil
http://www.swissinfo.ch/eng/swiss_news/Swiss_stage_world_s_first_antifeminism_event.html?cid=28666110
You know what's really funny about this?
He created this group because he got the shittiest end of the shit stick in his divorce case and was unable to see his daughter for 6 years. And apparently most men's rights groups use this example that men are often discriminated against in custody cases. But heres the thing, I'm willing to bet that judges give children to the mother because she has been staying home with them and he's been working. He doesn't see them except for 20% of the day. BUT if women had equality and were able to work as often as men, there wouldn't be such a clear contender for custody would there?
AH-HAH! Beat you didn't I?!
You know what's really funny about this?
He created this group because he got the shittiest end of the shit stick in his divorce case and was unable to see his daughter for 6 years. And apparently most men's rights groups use this example that men are often discriminated against in custody cases. But heres the thing, I'm willing to bet that judges give children to the mother because she has been staying home with them and he's been working. He doesn't see them except for 20% of the day. BUT if women had equality and were able to work as often as men, there wouldn't be such a clear contender for custody would there?
AH-HAH! Beat you didn't I?!
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