Sunday, June 5, 2011

tolerance

So I've been thinking about this for a while. There was a kerfuffle at my school recently between the feminist people and the college republicans. They (the republicans) accused us of being hypocrites. We apparently project an ideal of tolerance, we appear to want to accept everyone and everything. Everything that is except conservative opinions.

Now this isn't the first time I've been accused of being a hypocrite so the claim hit me hard. But I think I've come up with a response I like.

Being frank for a moment, I think the republicans are wrong. I don't agree with their views on business, taxes, health care and abortion (among other things). However, I still love them and think they have a right to their opinions. We are all humans and we are connected through everyone and everything. What I can't stand is when people in positions of power (and let's face it, even Obama has occasionally caved to the will of the right) try to make laws based on their political beliefs. Especially since they are often influenced by their religious beliefs. I'm sorry but saying I can't get an abortion because God created that sacred life is ridiculous to me. That being said, I couldn't care less if you believe your life is sacred because God has a plan for you. The only way you'll annoy me is if you make me thank God for my American Freedom (cheers elementary school).

Ok so tolerance. I don't know about you but when I hear the word I think of like a crazy great aunt who just wants to talk about herself and her porcelain ferret collection. You don't want to sit there and listen, but you tolerate it because she's family. When I'm told my political ideology is tolerant of the gay community, something doesn't sit right with me. How could I merely put up with the gay community when they make up some of the best people I have ever known or could ever hope to know? I don't tolerate them and I don't accept them because that's a ridiculous statement. They are my people, my friends.

So there you go. I like the people, not their ability to control my life, and I love the gays for just being who they are. Please stop saying I'm a hypocrite. I'm not. Thanks.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Who run the world? Actually I think it's men...

Her heart is in the right place. I like what this song has to say but I think it follows a trend of women being represented in the media as more powerful than they are. I'm sorry but women do not run the world. And if we're being told we do then we're less likely to keep fighting to make it actually happen.

And her lyrics are really confusing. She talks about women graduating from college, making millions and still having babies but still hopes a boy like her?

"Boy you know you love it
How we're smart enough to make these millions
Strong enough to bare the children
Then get back to business
See, you better not play me
Don't come here baby
Hope you still like me
If you hate me!"

This is super heteronormitive and completely betrays what she just said. Now in her music video, the first time she says "hope you still like me" she flips off the camera so I thought initially that it was in jest but throughout the song she's crawling around like a stripper so I thinking maybe not...

And if women were really so powerful, why does she have two men in front of her at the beginning?

Also the end, they salute the men. The women in front salute and the women behind her (I mean hundreds of beautiful dancers) stand with their hands clasped as if to prey or at least very respectful and non threatening.

I just don't know what Beyonce hopes to prove with this song and video. I mean this is the woman who gave us Independent Women! I know she wants to support women. But then she does this, or Single Ladies (a song about needing to get married!)

Anyway I just hope she knows how far away from equality we are.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

New obsession!

So Americans. We basically have no idea whats going on in the world. At least that's what the world thinks of us. I found this new comic that pokes fun at pretty much everyone and their stereotypes (including the US)

It's very very funny but now I'm completely in love with the artist. On her DeviantArt blog she made some excellent points about masculinity!

"A woman can feel like a woman if she is being the passive/submissive part, she can feel like a woman if she is being the active/dominant part, she can feel like a woman if she is with a man, and she can feel like a woman if she is with a woman.

Men however are not so lucky."

*Swoon*

Sunday, May 8, 2011

inspiring

Great comic by XKCD!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Phenomenal Woman

A poem by Maya Angelou:

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

huh?

Friday, April 29, 2011

Dr. Seuss


I'm in crisis right now. I keep finding reasons to carry on but I'm so exhausted I don't know if I can. I thought this was a cool sign that I haven't decided if I'll ignore or not...


Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Give Me Everything

New song I heard on the radio tonight. I'm not sure how I feel about it.

There's not much to the lyrics and only about half of them are disturbing.

So lines like "for all we know we might not get tomorrow, lets do it tonight. I will love love you tonight" are really quite sweet. I like the idea that we should love now.

I think where it gets creepy is when he starts talking about loving as in have sex with, which starts with "grab somebody sexy, tell 'em hey, Give me everything tonight"

I don't like the idea that sex requires women to "give" everything. If we give everything, we are left with nothing. We constantly talk about sex in these terms. Women give it up, men get some. Men never give anything. I don't blame them so much for these lyrics though. It's a common way to talk about sex so I guess ignorance is not the worst crime.

But it gets even worse with "Excuse me but I might drink a little bit more than I should tonight and I might take you home with me tonight"

So hopefully he's not thinking he's going home with her no matter what she says, but I think it's a generally bad idea when anyone goes out thinking they'll get a little too drunk and then fall into bed with someone. I'm not saying I've never done that or that it's always going to result in date rape, but it's a distinct possibility. And glorifying it in song does not help anyone.

Also he says he's "desperate tonight." So not good... To me, a desperate man means a violent man. I guess that's because men have to continually prove their masculinity. I mean they are always in danger of being feminine (insults for men are "little bitch" "Fag" "pussy") So if a big way men can prove their manliness is sexual prowess, what do you think happens when they are desperate to do so? I don't know about you, but I won't go home with a man I don't know who is desperate to have sex. That's just such a turn off. So what happens to the man who can't prove his masculinity through sex? He seeks to prove it with physical strength.

(Obviously this is not true of ALL men. Of course I know plenty of good men who don't buy into this bullshit. This is just what I'm interpreting from this song)

So another line starts off really sweet, "Reach for the stars and if you don't grab 'em at least you're on top of the world" then gets creepy, "Think about it. Cause if you slip I'm gonna fall on top of you girl *haha*"

What? Not if you slip I'll catch you, if you slip I'll land on you. So I'm interpreting this in two ways. One men are always higher than women. They will always have more power and more money and more status than women. So even if women are on top of the world, men will still be one step higher. But I don't think this song is smart enough to make such a social statement.

The other way is if she slips up, he'll take advantage. I'm getting that more from the sinister sounding laugh at the end of the phrase.

Anyway. I don't think I like this song. Sucks too cause the melody is great and Ne-Yo has a lovely voice.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Is it any wonder?

When this is the commonly held view of women on this campus, is it any wonder sexual violence is so prevalent?

Friday, April 22, 2011

Yay we can get protective orders!

So one of the big things about Yeardly Love's case was that she couldn't have gotten a protective order against her ex-boyfriend if she tried. THANKFULLY that's now changed!

Late last month the bill HB2063 changed the law that specifies only people who could get protective orders were spouses against their partners.

It began as HB2340 but of course a republican had to go and steal Del Morrisseys thunder... But I guess if it helps college aged women (the demographic most likely to experience IPV) I don't really care which party got it passed.

Good step forward Virginia. Somewhat restores my faith in humanity!

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Friday, April 8, 2011

Street Harassers

For some reason recently I am being targeted for street harassment more than any other time in my life. Maybe it's because I'm spending so much more time walking down main street but honestly I didn't think it was this bad. I'd like to share todays incident.

So I'm walking in the light rain north on south main in a hot pink sweatshirt with my hood up and comfortable jeans. A man in a white car, driving in the same direction I'm walking, honks at me. When he passed he looked back at me just to make sure I knew he meant me. Well with no other pedestrians around I was pretty sure..... Anyway here's what is wrong with this particular situation. He didn't see my face. Like I said, he came up from behind me and my hood was up. The only reason he suspected I was female is I was wearing pink. So for anyone who feels complimented by street harassment, know it's not about how you look. This man had no idea what I looked like. He wanted to make sure I knew he was looking anyway. I told him to jog on.

Another incident I'd like to share does have more to do with looks. Last Monday was beautiful. I was walking down south main to an event in just a white tank top and jeans. I felt so good to bare skin after keeping it hidden under coats! But my pleasure wasn't just for me. Several men felt entitled to hijack my good mood, thinking it was for them. I got honks as well as blatant stares from people who should be watching the road.

What makes me so mad about this shit is all these men felt entitled to express their unsolicited opinion about me. It's not like some stranger comes up to you and says "I like your shoes." These men were expressing their satisfaction in my appearance in a way that says to me, "I'd really like to fuck you. And if you don't want to, I can make you." It's about power, control, and intimidation.

We were talking in my sociology class about how we describe attractive women. "Stunning" and "knock out" are two relevant examples. My perceived appearance to men is an attack. I've stunned them, I've knocked them out. So to them, I have some power. Power they don't want to be subject to. So they take it back. They take it back with violence against women, which starts with street harassment.

A lecture I went to a few weeks ago mentioned how quickly "hey beautiful" can turn into "hey bitch!" Usually followed with "I was only trying to compliment you!" If it doesn't feel like a compliment, then it isn't. If it feels creepy and wrong, then it is.

Ken

I've just finally watched Toy Story 3 and I am moderately concerned. Yes it's dark and a little scarier than the previous two, but I'm more concerned about the gender policing going on.

So Tour guide Barbie finally gets to meet her Ken at daycare. Though Ken may not be all he seems, he is super feminine. This doesn't seem to bother Barbie at all but Ken's bros spare no feelings. Constantly referring to him as a "girl's toy," it's pretty clear they're insulting him. The movie plays up the fact that he likes clothes and dresses well. These are all things boys aren't supposed to like so it's used as comic effect. Also the scene in which Barbie is working to trick Ken shows that boys who like clothes are less intelligent than women (and that just won't do).

The worst is during the credits when the original cast gets a letter about how life is going at daycare. Someone comments on how neat the authors handwriting is and immediately gives credit to Barbie. Well the camera pans down to the signature and low and behold Ken wrote it. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA you see? It's funny! Men aren't supposed to have good hand writing!!

So while I'm sure this movie was aimed toward big kids (like my age!) it is still a cartoon and children are supposed to watch it. So let me ask you this Disney and Pixar, do you really want young boys growing up thinking it's super manly to dress and write like an idiot? No? Good. Find better jokes.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Anti-Choice

So the other day I had an interesting conversation with an anti-choicer I work with. She was asking me questions about why I believe abortion is a legitimate option for pregnant women. I told her I don't believe a zygote is a human until it is able to survive outside the womb. She began spouting Pregnancy Crisis Center lies about when the baby can actually be born and when organs are fully formed. It's been bothering me so instead of writing my dance paper I was looking up a real timeline of how a baby develops in the womb.

What I find most distasteful is the bit about the fingernails. Now I hated the movie Juno because I think it's really dumb and shows an incorrect version of what teen pregnancy is really like. I think though there is a touch of validity to it. So there's a scene in which Juno goes to an abortion clinic to take care of her pregnancy and she runs into a pro-life classmate with a poster. The classmate claims her baby already has fingernails and Juno decides not to abort the baby on the basis that her baby could scratch her insides... Well nails don't even appear until week 20 and they don't extend beyond the fingertips until week 37. As much as I don't like this movie, it has accurately shown the flat out lies anti-choicers will spew in order to manipulate vulnerable, pregnant women. What the hell?!

Sunday, March 13, 2011

religion = child abuse... yea that makes sense


so I've seen this quote twice and I just think it's sick. I don't buy into organized religion and I really don't like how conservatives use it to justify all sorts of inequities. But I don't think teaching children about religion is the same as child rape. Duh. I mean come on people!! This would have been funny if they left it at "waving it around." So I don't think it's meant to be funny. I think this was meant to make a statement like "quit stopping me on the street in Edinburgh telling me how to convert jews to christianity" (yes this happened to me and my friend Katy)

But see, now that I think about it, it's perfectly fine to show your spirituality. I say this because many people say this about homosexuality. Gays and lesbians aren't allowed to hold hands or kiss in public because that would be shoving their way of life down other people's throats. Meanwhile heteros are free to express their affection in whatever way they wish. Stupid patriarchy... what the hell?!

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Seriously Maryland, What the hell?



Behave yourself now...


Oh I love Spring Break! I finally have time to procrastinate homework and write blog entries!!

Ok so I was reading that quote, "Well behaved women rarely make history" (by historian Laurel Thatcher Ulrich) and I was thinking about the validity of that statement.

While now I think it serves primarily as an excuse to do what ever sexy, dirty, and downright fun acts we want, it builds on the gender expectation that women should be calm, chaste, caring, quiet and gentle. This is how we are supposed to "behave."

Now this quote refers to women who have broken that mold and lived life on their own terms. I'm going to pick a few famous women I think fit the bill and examine how exactly they've misbehaved.

Ok first I'm going to go with Alice Paul. She saw
the women's suffrage movement to the very end, getting thrown in jail and starting a hunger strike in the process. All she was trying to do was make men and women a little more equal. She wasn't asking for much, just the right to vote. Is this really misbehaving?











Next Marilyn Monroe. A sex icon. I think that about sums it up. Now how was she misbehaving? She was having lots of sex with lots of men. Kind of like men do with women....























So far we have Alice Paul who was trying to tackle gender equality and Marilyn Monroe who was behaving like a man. A pattern?

What about women who made history even though they are remembered for generally behaving well? Jackie Kennedy for instance. Well I propose that she only achieved such success because of her attachments to men. Jackie Kennedy would not have been able to make such contributions to the world if not for her marriage to President John F Kennedy.

So the lesson here ladies is there are only two ways to make history: Marry an influential man or act like a man.

Think we've grown? Think again.

This article, written a mere 4 days ago, appeared in the New York Time (THE TIMES PEOPLE!!)

It tells the story of an 11 year old girl who was gang raped by several adult males.

Ok so this article is fraught with blaming the victim. Just look at what neighbors said, "she dressed older than her age, wearing makeup and fashions more appropriate to a woman in her 20s. She would hang out with teenage boys at a playground, some said." She was obviously asking to be raped.

Also 'The students who were arrested have not returned to school, and it is unclear if they ever will. Ms. Gatlin said the girl had been transferred to another district. “It’s devastating, and it’s really tearing our community apart,” she said. “I really wish that this could end in a better light.”' Look this should not tear the community apart. Anyone who is on the side of the rapists is a rape apologist and is completely overlooking that this was a child. It is never the child's fault. It is never the victims fault. The only people who are to blame are the GROWN MEN who RAPED an 11-year-old girl. They should be thrown in jail for the rest of their lives and the community should be supporting the survivor and her family. I mean what the hell?!

This is a response that is more eloquent than I can put it just now. She makes the same two points I do as well as several more. Check her out!

Friday, March 11, 2011

Stumble Upon part 2

This one is on Masculinity and manhood. How interconnected are they?

"the positive definitions of masculinity are not really about being a man but simply about being a person" - This ties into the idea that male experience = human experience. Why do we say "mankind" anyway? dumb.


Thursday, March 10, 2011

Stumble Upon!!

I know I'm a bit late to the trend but I just started stumbling and I love it!! I thought I'd share something that found me.

15 Aspects of Third Wave Feminism is a well written and very informative article on feminism.

One thing I wanted to point out was number 13. It states that feminists are not sexist against men. It's so silly to say because it should be so obvious! Duh, we're not sexist against men! We fight sexism, any and all. We can't expect women to break out of their mandated gender roles without encouraging men to do the same. It's not fair and it's not realistic. Men need the choice too. They need to be able to choose (just as women do) whether they want a 9-5 job or stay home with the kids. They can wear pink or not, play contact sports or dance, build houses or knit, etc.

It's insane that I even need to say it but I think sometimes we feminists lose this knowledge. Embracing men into feminism and showing them they have something to gain from it is so important to the cause. If men stop thinking women are taking their power away, they'll stop fighting us. Working towards gender equality means we have to work for all sides. Simple as that.

ET by Katy Perry

The lyrics in Katy Perry's new song ET include:

"They say be afraid, You're not like the others..."
"Infect me with your love and fill me with your poison. Take me... wanna be a victim, ready for abduction."

Not so subtly she's singing about the alien ET but honestly these lyrics glorify abusive relationships. I'm splitting hairs you say? Maybe. But I believe there is a fine line between singing an ironic song about loving an alien and wanting to "be a victim." Oh well, what can we expect from the woman who set our perception of lesbians back a decade? But seriously, what the hell?

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

oh Rush, how I loathe thee...

"The problem is, and dare I say this, it doesn't look like Michelle Obama follows her own nutritionary, dietary advice. And then we hear that she's out eating ribs at 1,500 calories a serving with 141 grams of fat per serving...I'm trying to say that our First Lady does not project the image of women that you might see on the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue or of a woman Alex Rodriguez might date every six months or what have you." - Rush Limbaugh

So right, according to the fattest man in the world, Rush Limbaugh, (who couldn't get on fox and friends if he tried because they all look alike), Michelle Obama (or as she's affectionately called by the conservative bloggers, "Moo-chelle") is getting a little hefty and apparently Alex Rodriguez (a Yankee) would never date her.

Apparently we should all strive to look like this:






















Or this:






























But not this:

Oh no, god forbid you look anything like this fatty-mic-fatterson. I mean look at her! She's so HUGE!!

So obviously my point is, Rush is stupid. We should kick him off the air. I mean what the hell?!

















So the point Rush so generously tries to point out to us is that we need to strive to not only be like a woman Alex Rodriguez would want to date or a woman on the cover of Sports Illustrated (but only the swimsuit edition because normal female athletes are all lesbians) but we need to BE them! Because they are the only attractive women in the world and if Rush doesn't want to fuck us, then life just isn't worth living.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Are you a "guy"?

Ok so there's this Brad Paisley song called "I'm Still A Guy" (listen to the song here) and it explains to women how "guys" are.

According to Brad, guys hunt and fish, punch other guys out and always want sex. They definitely do NOT get facials, use lotion (well for the sole purpose of making their hands smooth...), or get botox. Because gosh, they might as well "get neutered"...

Alright so I get that Brad is trying to be funny and clever. However, his generalization of what real men do excludes so many male hominids.

I'm on spring break and have lost all motivation to explain this stupidity further so I'm just going to turn it over to this guy and he'll clear everything up!

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Planned Parenthood.

Ok so I've signed the thing and I completely support any prochoice efforts.

But I feel like I have to share my own personal experience with this organization that goes against the current trend...

So when I was a senior in high school I was just starting to explore my sex life. I was gaining friends who'd already "done it" and sharing stories. Well a good personal friend told me her partner pulled out instead of wearing a condom. This is of course a stupid thing to do (BOY!). Wear a damn condom! So we chatted and decided she needed plan B. Well she was only 17 and you need to be 18 to buy it without a prescription. I was 18 so I offered to buy it for her. I had no idea where to get it (walmart in case you're wondering - $40) so I searched the internet and found the number for Planned Parenthood. I called to talk about Plan B and (I will never forget this) the woman told me in the most judgmental tone that Plan B wasn't contraception, it was an abortion pill. I told her that was ok and she asked me if I was sure I wanted to abort the baby. So I hung up. The next day my friend and I skipped class to go get a pregnancy test and Plan B. We were such class acts lol

The point is, this woman completely turned me off PP. She absolutely lied when she said Plan B was the abortion pill. It is contraception. It's emergency contraception. In another life it was called EC. Now I've never called back because she scarred me for life but if that's what PP is still doing, I can't condone giving them any money at all.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Scotland is the best place in the world.

Much thanks to my beautiful friend Katy for passing this on to me.

I love Scotland because it's beautiful and breathtaking and amazing. I want to move there and be a part of the Never Ever campaign. Who's going to help me get there?

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Really American Apparel?


Really?! Are you fucking kidding me? You sexualized watches? Congrats, y'all lost a customer.

Monday, February 14, 2011

empowering domination

Rhianna's S&M is brilliant. I just saw the video and until this moment I was actually very concerned for her well being. But the way I see it, this video is a wonderful expression of empowerment.

Her costume of tabloids, along with the carefully selected quotes like "whore" and "daddy issues?" was a great idea. Her response to the media is a solid "fuck you," which I wholly support. I mean what are they thinking? Publicly analyzing her after a trauma? I'll admit that I was personally offended by Love the Way You Lie, but simply because I thought it to be in poor taste.

However, S&M has a totally different tone. Take a look at it and see for yourself!

Friday, February 4, 2011

I'm gonna go with no...

So Playboy has come out with a perfume. It's called Lovely. I really don't know where to begin.

I'm going to approach this from a heterosexist point of view because while I assume there are some lesbians who purchase playboys, I don't believe Playboy targets the homosexual community.

Ok so Playboy has come out with a perfume. Not cologne. Perfume. So they're clearly targeting women. They are trying to get women to buy a product to make men want them more. Artificial sexual selection people. It works.

Now what does this say about the women who buy it? Personally I think it's perfectly fine to enjoy being the subject of provocative pictures, but playboy isn't about the pleasure of women. It's all about male pleasure and that's ok too. My problem comes when you expect women to pay for the pleasure of men. Playboy is selling this perfume to women to support their effort in the porn business. Furthermore, the goal is to make women want to smell like Playboy bunnies, which we have just established has nothing to do with female pleasure. This is all about women spending their money in yet another way to make themselves more attractive to men. Because it's always all about men.

In the animal world, males go to great lengths to be attractive to females. This is called intersexual selection. For instance the Peacock. If he has a giant, deep blue, attractive tail, he will get more women. He will also be at a greater risk for predation. He will quite literally die to get a mate. Women are engaging in similar activities. We starve ourselves and get elective surgery all for a mate. Humans are supposed to have high reasoning. Meaning we should know better.

So women, don't buy this perfume. Don't support the porn industry in this way. If you really want to, but some porn of your own and actually get off. Don't fake it. After all, at least you can tell.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Is that bad? Answer: Yes.

Ok so I made a terrible mistake a few days ago. I failed to properly stand up for my friends. I feel just awful about it, but I'd like to explain so that if you ever find yourself in a similar situation, you can learn from my mistakes.

My Psych 101 professor decided to have a discussion on sexuality and it went horribly. She was absolutely not equipped to facilitate this discussion and what's worse is she didn't even try! She just let every ass hole with a mouth say whatever bullshit, idiotic opinion they wanted. I was so angry. I said nothing. I wanted to get up and leave but I knew that would be even less productive than staying silent. My problem was I knew if I worked up the courage to actually call these people out on their heterosexism I would leave myself open to a swarm of argumentative comments and I'm sure I wouldn't have been able to handle that.

I did manage to say in response to this one guy who claimed homosexuals choose to be gay, "When did you choose to be straight?" I must have yelled it because my professor said, "well not you, maybe the whole class?" See? I was rash and harsh and I knew I would be. Next time I hope to be able to keep my cool and actually make a rational explanation that sexuality is not a choice and to even suggest otherwise is ludicrous.

I'm sorry my gay and lesbian friends. I should have done more. I should do more. I promise to do better next time.

Cheers.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Don't buy the cow. Period.

This is bullshit!

We need, NEED to get away from the idea that sex is something to be traded or sold. Apparently women are only supposed to have sex when it will get us something. Whether it be security in the form of marriage or money from prostitution, we aren't supposed to have sex unless it can be used to our advantage. Sex is not "worth" anything. It's supposed to be shared between two people who really want it. And another thing, I'm so sick and tired of romantic relationships being the most important thing in a girls life. Why do men get to be bachelors and women are old maids?

"I'm just saying women have had extreme successes -- which is fantastic! -- it's just those successes don't translate to success in the relationship field."

Relationships are great. I love being in one but it is not and never will be my whole world. I'm not going to plan my life around getting married or having children. If it happens, if I am so lucky as to find a man with whom I can spend my life, great. If not, I see nothing wrong with my other relationships. I have relationships. We all do. My friends and family are so important to me and I will spend the rest of my life with them. What is it about romantic relationships that are so bloody important? Is it sex? If so then it just furthers my case about lessening our stress on sex in marriage. Lets just all find people we care about to be intimate with and stop caring about the labels!

Feel free to disagree with me. I just think the world would be a better place if we stopped slut shaming our women and started embracing each other as vibrant sexual beings. Without the price tag.

Friday, January 14, 2011

It Gets Worse

So in response to the "It gets better" campaign, The Second City (Who for the record made a great it gets better video by the sassy gay friend) made an "It gets worse" video. It is very funny and So obviously a JOKE! But of course there are some dumbasses on youtube who feel the need to make dumbass comments. Instead of commenting myself, I've decided to be annoyed here, where I'm allowed.

Here's one:
"Nothing like completely over-generalizing all white, straight people. This video is basically reverse-discrimination and I think it is offensive. Yes, many straight people discriminate against people of other sexual orientation and generalize them, but does it really make you feel better to do the same thing back?" - Dumbass Youtube Commenter

To anyone crying reverse discrimination, hate to be the one to break it to you but that's not a real thing. Discrimination is the systematic oppression of one group for the overall benefit of another. We live in a patriarchy and that means Men and heterosexuals are always going to be favored over deviants like women, transsexuals, and homosexuals. So while occasionally a member of the privileged group may be temporarily denied an advantage, it is not discrimination.

Also, this video is talking about high schoolers who are so insecure with their own selves that they lash out against the gay community. It is NOT saying all straight, white men are douchebags. Just the actual douchebags.

Anyway, don't take my word for it. Here's the video. Check it out for yourself!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sJGkPrUOnbA&feature=related

Friday, January 7, 2011

The Tudors

This is a slightly less annoyed post. I love these!

I've begun watching The Tudors and so far I am not disappointed. If you've read The Other Boleyn Girl, you know that sex is just everywhere. King Henry VIII had lots and lots and lots of sex. And good sex for that matter. There was a saying to encourage wives to submit to sex with husbands they didn't love and who didn't think to please them. Women were told to "Lie back and think of England." Well these women with Henry seem to being having a wonderful time in bed and not in a faking orgasm type way.

But that's not why I'm writing about it. So this chick, Bessie Blount, was one of the kings mistresses. There's a scene in which Bessie comes into Henry's room and as he begins to touch her he asks, "Do you consent?" To which she breathes, "Yes, Majesty." Then he rips off her clothes. I must admit I creamed my jeans a little at this. Nothing sexier than a man who asks first, yea?

Second was Henry's friend is caught having sex with the daughter of a powerful man in court. He runs to the King and demands punishment for the man who ruined his daughters honor. Henry says there will be no punishment unless the daughter cries rape. I swoon! Now I may be ignorant but I'm not sure they took rape too seriously back then. Now I may be giving the show too much credit, but for me this scene here tells me that if this woman had cried rape, there is a chance that Henry would have taken her seriously.

Come to think of it I feel like rape would have been a huge issue amongst women of important families. Virginity was such a commodity that if it was stolen, it would be a great grievance to the family already unfortunate enough to include daughters.

So yes, I think I'll stick with this show for a while.